The best way to start doing work that is right for you is to give yourself small examples of proof along the way that you can do this.It usually starts small and then builds. With a little risk and self trust, you can make the necessary changes now to find the work which is right for you at this time of your life.
Let's start with some definitions
First
let's define the difference between right work and wrong work. Wrong
work is work which you don't enjoy. The work feels stifling and
constraining. Having wrong work you don't look forward to going there
every day. You secretly hope some crisis occurs so you don't have to go
because any alternative seems better then another wasted day at the
office. Wrong work causes stress, anxiety, health problems, and
relationship problems. Wrong work leaves you drained at the end of the
day. You leave work asking yourself, how can I switch to anything else?
Having wrong work it feels like you are doing the work meant for other
people. The work doesn't feel right for you. It doesn't match your
interests and abilities. Right work
feels completely different! With right work you feel full of energy
while working and content. Right work leaves you wanting more at the
end of the day. You are excited, fulfilled, and feel like you are
contributing to an area that is coherent for you. Having right work you
feel happier and everything in your life seems to work much better as
well. Right work makes you feel like you can do this work forever. You
feel like your abilities and interests are aligned. You like the people
you work with, and everyone seems to feel the same about you. Finally,
with the right work you can't tell the difference between play and
work, vocation and vacation, and you leave the office sad on Friday
that you have to wait until Monday to continue!
Start to look in the right places
First,
decide what places are right for you. Many times people tend to leave
wrong work and continue to look for another wrong work! Decide now what
work fits you! Where do people like you work? What type of people do
you feel the most comfortable working around? Do you prefer to work
alone? What kind of work would leave you breathless at the end of the
day? What work would feel like play? What kind of work would get you
excited about Mondays? Talk to people who want to do what you want to
do? If you can't decide now what you want to do for a lifetime, that's
ok, but at least you can begin the search. Change your thinking
perspective. Are you always thinking of the past and worried about the
future? It is time to change your thinking. Right here, right now, what
is the work that you would love to do the most and why? If you know the
why, you will find the how. Try out test marketing approaches. Even if
you want to work for someone else the steps are the same. Make a
business card describing exactly what you want to do and who you want
to be. At the bottom of the card, describe the services and or products
that you want to sell. Use this new persona to promote yourself. People
can't help you if you don't tell others what you want to do. If you
plan to work for someone else, your elevator speech should take less
than 20 seconds and clearly state something like this,"My name is Sammy
and I have 23 years in the insurance industry as an IT professional and
I am currently transitioning to working in the animal industry in a
similar role and to be closer to the industry which I care about''. Ask
the other person, “Do you have any ideas or contacts I could follow up
with to assist on my search?” If you want to go into business for
yourself the elevator speech is slightly different. If someone asks you
about you and your work, you can respond with something like this, "I
am the founder of XYZ company and I help people to focus on designing
and or develop XYZ products and services''. It also adds a nice touch
when you can say "this is my passion and life's work!”
Talk to the right people
Don't
talk to people who have little interest in what you want to do. Best
case is they will listen without adding value and worst case their
opinions will confuse and frustrate you. Do talk to people who share
your interests and passions. These people are easy to find if you
attend the right meetings, conferences, read the right books, and join
the right on-line forums. When you talk to others, who share your
interests and already might be doing what you want to do, you can't
help but pick up new ideas and insights.
Think about right things
Think
about why this work is important for you. Think about how your life
will be different once you start to do this work. Imagine your new work
day actually doing work which interests you, gets you excited. Think
about why this is exactly the right time in your life for positive
change. What you focus on you will attract. Sadly, many people focus on
what they don't want and this is what they end up with.
Try out new approaches
Be
creative and try out new ideas you would be afraid to try before.
Attend a conference, develop a new business card, or join an on-line
group. Actually, start to offer services in the areas you feel most
confident in! If you feel you need more skills, attend school again,
get a certificate, or at least attend a seminar. The best way to start
doing work that is right for you is to give yourself small examples of
proof along the way that you can do this. It usually starts small and
then builds.
Be flexible and open to BIG changes
Normally
big change is needed when moving towards the work which is right for
you. Be prepared and open to this. Move towards pleasure in your life.
As a result, you will be more open to change, more creative, and more
proactive. The reverse strategy just holds you back. When people don't
take risk, they are more negative, less receptive to new ideas, and
reactive. Thriving change and being flexible are great attributes when
seeking for the right work.
Don't be afraid to ask for support!
Get
a mentor or coach to help along the way. Usually our family members are
interested, of course, but these are vested interests. Our family
members usually like it when we stay the way we are and don't rock the
boat-stability. No stability is good when you are doing the wrong work.
Better to seek out external experts who can listen, guide, and help you
plan the second half of your life, which works better for you. Most
people never had a coach unless they were on a sports team in their
youth.
Be prepared to make sacrifices
Ok, this is the part you don't want to hear! Finding right work
IS major change and requires great sacrifice. The sacrifice can be
different for each person. Generally, it will be around money and life
standards in the short term. It can also be around relationships, and
it can be around where one lives and multiple other trades-off. The
reason most people don't do the right work especially after 40 is because these life changes are hard to make especially without much external support.
Are you ready to make the needed changes NOW in your life?
Being
ready is the most important first step. The second step is actually
doing something about it. With a little risk and self trust, you can
make the necessary changes now to find the work which is right for you
at this time of your life. It won't be easy but it will be well worth
it. As a result the bounce and energy will return to your step, you
feel happier and most important gain a sense of fulfillment which will
last a lifetime.
I'll be cheering you on as you go!
Craig Nathanson
| Additional articles about mid-life coaching |
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| About the author |
Craig is a 25 year management veteran, Executive coach, college professor, author, and workshop leader. Also, Craig Nathanson is The Vocational Coach helping people and organizations thrive in their work and life.
Craig Nathanson is the founder of The Best Manager , workshops and products aimed at bringing out the best in those who manage and lead others. |
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