Finding A Church That Fits You

     I can assure you that most Christians have found themselves church shopping at some point in their journey.  At the onset, let me first say that we need to stop feeling guilty about this inevitability.  Finding a church that fits us is not at all an unrealistic aspiration.   Maybe it goes without saying, but churches tend to differ greatly in their focus, function, and beliefs.  So finding a good fit is not always as easy as you might think.  The reality is that most American believers have suffered numerous bad experiences at church.  This is evidenced in the fact that most people who claim to espouse the Christian faith in this country are no longer regularly attending a local church.  Though it is true that most of us are still struggling to recover from the past offences of others, deep down where it really matters, we still want to find a place where we know we belong.

     If you currently find yourself without a church that you feel good about calling your home, whatever the reason, then allow me the opportunity to bring you some encouragement.  Please know that you are not alone.  After serving as a local church pastor for many years, I too have often felt like the proverbial wayfaring stranger.  Unlike the typical local church of 50 years ago, churches today have a much higher influx and attrition rate.  Of course there are many reasons that account for this phenomenon, but I believe the primary reason is the increasingly transient nature of our culture.  Although most of us still highly esteem the values of family and community, we need to be honest about where we actually place them in our list of priorities.  I have lost count of how many times my family and I have moved in the last 20 years, but as a result, we have become keenly aware of the affect that it has had on our ability to build and maintain relationships.   In a word, that is what church is all about, relationship.

     People start attending church for many reasons, but ultimately we will stay at one for only one reason.  We have people there that matter to us.  Mission statements, programs, and doctrine aside, what truly is important to us is finding a group of people who care about who we are and what we have to bring.  Even though it may take more time and effort than we might at first think, we have to believe that a group like this is out there somewhere for us.  We were created to live in a family and a community.  Most of us no longer have close knit family ties, but we need not give up the hope of finding a loving church community.  Perhaps it is time to set aside our insecurities and emotional baggage and try again.  Maybe we could get involved with a small church home group, or simply find someone we can meet for lunch.  We have to learn to initiate relationships if we truly want connectivity.  Like it or not, we need each other, and sometimes the only way to find a friend is to be one.  If you need help locating a local church in you area, try using the links provided below.